So its Valentine’s day…. Love on yourself and every one all around you day… Do that shit its effective…Michael is of course anti-Valentine’s day or doing anything for any of the “Hallmark Holidays“. According to him he’d rather celebrate a random Tuesday with a gift to show his love. Apparently, this random Tuesday has yet to arrive in the past 6 years but I’ve got my fingers crossed…
I’ve never really cared. I, mean, it’s not great for me to see other folks with their silly little flowers,teddy bears, cards, and candies. And all that stuff cause Michael shows me love in other ways that I am thankful for but….
Did you know there is going to be a BUT ?
But today I really just wish that when he walked through the door, he would have some half dead flowers or a little goofy dollar store teddy bear and a card. You know one of those cheesy between us hallmark cards that have some little goofy letter about how much he loves me, how important I am to him and all that I can’t live without you stuff that Michael is sooooooo not good at.
It’s just not his thing. Its not what he does. Its not what is important to him. Its not the way that he can best express his love for me. For Michael, His ultimate show of affection is to get up everyday and “handle it” for us… This song is the perfect example of who Michael is as a romantic…
The first lyrics are a perfect example of him:
Verse 1
I was told the true definition of a man was to never cry
Work til you die (Yeah) Got to provide (Yeah)
Always be the rock for my fam
Protect them by all means
And give you the things that you need, baby
Our relationship is suffering
Tryna give you what I never had
You say I don’t know how to love you, babe
Well, I say show me the way
I keep my feelings deep inside
I shadow them with my pride ( I )
I’m trying desperately,
Baby, just work with me …
I have probably taken the garbage out once the whole entire time that I have been with Michael… The once might even be an exaggeration but I do have some vague recollection of me with a garbage going to the dumpster at least once in these past 6 years… Even when we had separate apartments he would come to my house and take my garbage out. Romantic ? Not so much. But fantastic no less!
I’ve always had the option to work or not work. Bread winning is not something Michael ever expects me to do.
If I want continue to be the super fierce and uber fabulous stay at home mama that I am now, he is all for it… Alternately, if I wanted to up and make myself into some high power corporate attorney working mama he would be on board! If I wanted to be a champion nose picker for the rest of my life Michael would support me in my quest and find me every single competitive nosepicking tournament there was. He truly wants me to live my life anyway that I choose to… And he supports me in that everyday.
He loovves to hold my hand and to touch me in anyway. Not just in the sexy”Let’s Get It On” kind of way. But in the I honestly love you baby kind of way… If we are in any kind of close proximity together, some part of him will always be touching and rubbing on me. Most nights we sleep with are feetsies all wrapped up together. Some nights he just holds my hand all night while we fall asleep.
He will tell everyone with in earshot all the little goofy things that I can do well. “Senam can distinguish any song in less than three notes.”
He calls me baby, my love, darling, sweetheart and any other combination of those words you can imagine. It makes my heart skip. Every. Single. Time.
He also has been known to tell people that he thinks that “Her (me) sprit is so bright sometimes I can see it glow.”
His handwritten wedding vows were the most fantastic thing that brought the house down and to tears at our wedding. I can’t even type it without falling apart but essentially it was all about how being with me is like being in the presence of constant, beautiful sunshine. We had surprise insciptions put into our wedding bands… In mine, Michael wrote, ” when the sunshines it shines forever…” At first I thougt Rhianna? WTF? But then I got it…
He is the first one( and the loudest) to clap at any poetry or whatever performance I ever have.
He is my biggest critic, toughest editor, my most fanatical fan, my biggest supporter and my greatest help.
He is my husband.
He is my very best friend.
He is my valentine.
So maybe he won’t come home with the teddy bear or the chocolates.
But he will come home and love on me the very best way he knows how… And I’ll take those kind of love days over some hallmark one any day…
Stay fierce, fabulous, and in the sunshine,
Senam
Head Diva in Charge
Even tho I just read this today, I loved it because I am with a man who is very similar to Michael in his disdain for Valentine’s Day and I too, am waiting for the non-occasion when he spontaneously brings me flowers. I wish I had read this on V-Day because I was pissed at him. But you are so right to focus on all the things he does to let you know he loves you. Thanks!